Ok so anyone who knows me knows that I am extremely prone to weirdly bizarre and vivid dreams. When I sleep, my imagination goes into over drive, along with my daily going-ons, to form these crazy stories and images. Some make no sense at all, so I laugh and wonder what I was watching before I fell asleep to bring that on. Others are highly disturbing, to the point where I truly wonder if there is something horrible lying ahead of me; like my dreaming is trying to warn me. Ok so I know that sounds probably overly dramatic; I know that they are probably just subconscious feelings about that certain topic that manifest in a different way. But I have to admit, some of them are really frightening. So I thought, in this blog, I would share a few of my dreams with all of you. Some of them are totally crazy, others are disturbing. Some of them I take from a journal I’ve been keeping of my dreams, others, actually one, is a reoccurring nightmare I have been having since I was 11or 12. And then I will close with last nights dream mixed with outside influences that caused me to not be able to go back to sleep until 6 am. So here we go.
Just a preface: Ill warn you right now that some of you will see your name appear in these dreams. Please don’t take it the wrong way or be offended. I know that they truly horrible ones didn’t involve anyone I know DOING something horrible to me. I will also (when I can) add the date of the dream, if I can remember. So lets begin!
May 5, 2009
I was with Diana and her family at this enclosed water park, and Diana, Josh, Zach, and Chris were in a large river that was clear like a pool and snaked all through the park. They kept on going under to get a glimpse of this humpback whale, but every time they went under the whale would breech the surface and make it impossible to see under water. So I kept yelling at them to wait to go under but they couldn’t hear me.
The scene changed to Diana and the family sitting at a table eating and Josh was bragging about this new fishing wire he had that was stronger then anything out there but completely invisible to fish. He had a line cast that stretched to the other side of the park and his pole sitting beside him. So I started to follow his line and ran into Patrick Duffy (ok FYI.. no I hadn’t seen him or heard his name at all that day… weird it was him who was there.) He tried to get Josh’s secret of his fishing line out of me--- WOKE UP!
May 6, 2009
Diana and I were at Cooper; I was a senior but Diana had just been brought on as the new band director. I knew this, so I thought I could get away with being late! I went to a pub and hung out with some friends for a little while. When I started to make my way to school I realized traffic was super busy and I was going to be later then I thought; so I panicked. When I got to school, Diana was sitting on a desk talking to the students, and I snuck in and found a seat. She started talking about dress code, saying that she is all for people wanting to wear neon wind shorts; she welcomed it! I looked around and suddenly saw a toy-sized, real life T-Rex. It was running around, all through the students, looking for little things to get and hang from a noose it built. Sara (Josh’s sister) was sitting down and the dinosaur came to her and tried to take her Chihuahua from her to go hang it. Sara told it, “No, no, bad boy.” That’s when I realized it was her dinosaur. She kept apologizing profusely to those the dinosaur was bugging. She was soo embarrassed--- WOKE UP!
July 23, 2009
Diana had a pet hornet name Guadalupé. She asked me to take him for a walk so he could go to the bathroom. Of course wasps creep me out, so I was against it from the start, but I appeared to be fairly calm. I asked her if she has a leash for it because he could just fly away, and she said, “Nope, he is very well mannered, he will go where you go.” So I start walking Guadalupé, realizing that he goes to the bathroom like a bird does: it looks the same. He finishes going to the bathroom and then collapses on the ground, belly up, like he is dead. I look around and realize there are many wasps like this laying on the ground. All I could think was, “Diana is going to kill me!” Then Guadalupé popped up and started to fly again. It turns out going to the bathroom the way they did wore them out so they had to take a break. We go back to the house and Guadalupé starts swarming around my head. Of course I was freaking out, telling him to stop. She kept reassuring me that he wasn’t going to hurt me, but she was laughing so hard. Guadalupé landed on my ear and started to like look like he was going to crawl in. I told Diana I was serious; to get him off me. She got a cup and stuck it to me ear, then told Guadalupé to come. He crawled in the cup--- WOKE UP!
July 23, 2009 (2 dreams I remember in one night….. nice!)
I was walking around the house one day and saw several things flying in the air. I told mom and dad about them but they didn’t see them, so they didn’t believe me. As the days went on I saw more and more of these flying things; which I came to find out were fleas; and the parents finally started seeing them too. I left to go grocery shopping, and when I came back the fleas (now in the billions) had banded together to form these gigantic blobs or masses that could move in unison and hurt other objects (like in cartoons when bees form a hammer or a giant stinger.) I screamed and dad ran and got some Lysol spray. This worked and killed the fleas, but I had already been swarmed by the,. I told dad to spray me with the Lysol, but he wouldn’t. He would spray a paper towel then try to wipe them off. I ended up being rushed to the hospital. They tried to revive me with the paddles, but it was too late. Mom started crying and said, “Who’s going to do the grocery shopping now? --- WOKE UP!!
Reoccurring (I have this dream at least once a week, if not that, then every other week, since I was 11 or 12)
I’m coming out of school (Madison Middle School) and I see a man dressed all in black with a knife. It’s obvious he is coming for me. I try and hide behind other kids until I get to the bus, thinking that once I’m in the bus he can’t get me. I make my way to the bus, just as it is closing its doors, thinking that I had lost him and I was safe. I had this friend named Jason who rode the bus with me home since we lived in the same apts. When the bus stopped at home, Jason and I got off and started walking. I look back and see that the man in black had hitched a ride on the back of the bus. I scream to Jason to run, but the man gets to him first and slits his throat. Jason falls in a lump and I can’t move from fear. He starts towards me and I take off. I get home, run through the door, and lock it behind me. I turn around and see my entire family hung from the ceiling. I panic, thinking maybe they aren’t dead. I run over and they are all ice cold… dead. I pull out a pocket knife and try to cut them down when I hear someone trying to come in. I run out the back and upstairs to another neighbor. I bang on her door, begging her to let me in. She finally did, and I told her what had happened to my family and how I had to hide. I told her that if he came looking for me to not upset him but tell him you had no idea who I was. Then I went and hid in the last place I thought he would find me…. in the toilet. I closed the lid (Yes I magically fit). I hear a knock at the door and I catch my breath. I hear her talking; I hear him asking about me; then I hear silence. I stay in the toilet for at least 5 more hours. I finally crawl out and it’s dark. There is no sign of the man in black. I get to the door and see my neighbor cut into pieces. I had no emotions, I couldn’t feel anything. I stepped over what was left of her and went home. I walk in and close the door behind me; locking it. I make my way slowly over to my dead family and begin the process of cutting them down--- WAKE UP!
So now, to close, I will share last nights dream. It’s a little fuzzy and not completely organized so please bear with me. Here we go!
September 8, 2009
I’m working at First Christian Church and everyone has left for the day. It’s getting dark and I’m finishing up some things. I hear a tap on the front door. I hesitate to get it, because there are a lot of homeless people who hang around the church and I couldn’t help them and didn’t have answers for them. The knocking continued… it’s dark now…. So I go to take a peak. There is a woman outside. I unlock the door and tell her that we are closed and I couldn’t help her and that I was sorry. She started yelling at me telling me she just needed to use the phone and I could at least let her do that. I told her I would make the phone call if she would like. She told me she needed to call in her hours to Sonic because she forgot to turn in her time sheet and pay roll was tomorrow. I told her it might be easier to just fax it. So I let her in, thinking I watched the door close. We went into the office and I asked her for the number. She fumbled around and then I heard a man’s voice behind me. The woman grabbed me and the man started laughing, saying it was too easy to get in. He came in the room and punch me hard in the stomach and I passed out.
Ok so here is where I woke up several times. I kept trying to change the outcome. But no matter how I tried to change it something bad happened. One time I turned into ice and they crushed me. Another time they tied me up and pushed me up onto the roof.. then pushed me off the roof. Yet another time I ran to my car, just barely quick enough, but I fumbled with my keys and he came up behind me and twisted my neck. Then there was one where I made it in the car but I couldn’t get it to go into drive and he broke in the window and dragged me out, the whole time getting glass stuck in me all over. Then the worst, which I hesitate to share, ends with a raping and slit throat. So after this last time I wake up, completely startled, breathing heavy and trying desperately to clear my head. Then I hear a loud noise. To me, it sounds like someone knocking on the front door. I’m not kidding when I froze in my bed, I quit breathing, I was literally petrified. I didn’t move for about 3 minutes, but I decided I needed to figure out what that was, and if someone was in the house or if the front door was locked. I slowly walked out of my room, and Sophie immediately staring down the hallway. I walked to my mom’s room and she was up, she had heard it too, which made it that much worse. She thought something was falling off a trailer as it drove my or something. But since I had just had that dream I thought much worse, like my dream was coming true only in a different setting. I had to stand still and catch my breath again, but I felt like I needed to go look around. I went into the living room and Alex’s fur was standing on its end, he was all poofed up, which again didn’t help my fear. I looked out the peep hole…… nothing. I worked up the courage to look out the front window (from the side of course)…… nothing. It was pretty much impossible to get back to sleep after this. I tried to listen to soothing music or stick in Seinfeld and watch something funny. I even finished the book I was reading. I eventually fell asleep a little after 6 this morning.
Alright so now that you are thoroughly convinced I am crazy I will close this entry out. At least I know that my friends can always count on me when they want to hear an outrageous story. My parting words will be those that I say to my friends that lets them know they can settle in for a wild ride, “So…. I had this CRAZY dream last night!”
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Dreams
Posted by April at 1:35 PM 0 comments
Monday, May 25, 2009
8 Things
Ok so while im waiting for the videos on my other post to load I figured I would do this 8 Things post that my sister tagged me on!!
8 Things I Am Looking Forward To:
1. The New Harry Potter Movie
2. The New Moon Movie
3. Seeing my sister SOON
4. Tara's visit in July
5. Getting my own place (I already have some prospects)
6. Getting a new car (Have prospects for that as well lol)
7. Finishing my Recipe Scrap book
8. Starting and finishing my other scrap books!
8 Things I Did Yesterday:
1. Watched some netflix movies online
2. Did laundry
3. Talked to bryan
4. Cleaned up my room
5. Listened to some good music
6. Watched Last Holiday and Night at the Museum on TV
7. Made some meals
8. Played with the cats
8 Things I Wish I Could Do:
1. Take a trip to Europe with my sister
2. Travel anywhere, T and I have future plans, I'm just anxious for it to come around
3. Find a job that suits me completely
4. Get a new car NOW
5. Get my own place that meets all my requirements
6. See and speak to my sister more then I do, i hope to change that
7. See Coldplay or One Repulblic in Concert
8. Meet Robert Pattinson and not become a complete fool when i do! (Why cant we just be friends lol)
8 Shows I Watch:
1. The Office (Good season finale-- i was sooo excited)
2. NCIS ( I can watch over and over and over)
3. Gossip Girls
4. The Mentalist (Soo good and such a handsome man-- hes Australian or British I think)
5. Brothers and Sisters
6. Cold Case
7. Law & Order: CI and SVU
8. Smallville and Supernatural (Ok thats more then 8 but i dont care)
I only have one other person to tag and that Tara..... so T, you are officially tagged lol!!
Posted by April at 12:24 PM 0 comments
Time to play Catch Up
Hello to my fellow bloggers! So its been a while, i've noticed. Mind you i didnt realize just how long it had been until i logged in. So i have quite a bit to catch up on. It might be crazy, and random, and disoraganized so buckle up for the ride! HERE WE GO!!!!!
(This one has parts that make me laugh, especially with Ron!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96QRVfto7OM&feature=fvsre1
(This one is a little longer..... gives me chills!!! CANT WAIT)
On to movies. Ive been really catching up on Netflix lately, since TV is pretty much done for me for the summer. This section might be a little dull for some because im going to go through what ive seen that has caught my attention and what I thought!! The Duchess-- loved it, wish it had a different ending, but love Kiera Knightly! The Departed-- that was one of those movies that I didnt think it was necessary to have the f-word in every sentence, so it wasnt as good as I hoped. Ghost Town-- this has the guy from the british version of The Office-- I LOVED IT! I thought it was hilarious, very pleasantly suprised! Mirrors--OMG SOOO GOOD-- suprised ending you never see coming-- loved it !! Don't Mess with Zohan-- not impressed at all, I never laughed. The Cake Eaters-- this had Kristen Stewart in it, it is sort of an independent film but she did a really great job in it, i was impressed. The Secret Life of Bees-- ok wow this was an unbelievable movie-- the whole cast was phenomenal and Dakota Fanning was awesome. I cant wait to see her in New Moon and i want to see Push more then ever now! Bride Wars-- expected it to funnier so it was alright, not awful but not specatcular! Valkyrie-- ok so Im not a huge Tom Cruise fan, but this movie was actually pretty good. My single thought after I sae the movie was just how much of a coward Hitler was, i guess it had never really hit me just how much so until after that movie. How so many people could follow a man like that and what would they think if they knew just how much of a coward he was elludes me-- crazy! Bangkok Dangerous-- Huge Nicholas Cage fan so loved the movie-- it was a little different but still good. Didnt see the ending coming!! Made of Honor-- cute little movie. It was cool to see Owen from Grey's Anatomy in there as well, although i think i prefer him with facial hair lol! Vantage Point-- kept me on my toes thats for sure, i had to really pay attention so i could keep up but it was good! Next (movie title)-- Another Nicholas Cage movie so of course I liked it! YAY Nicholas Cage!
Mom is doing well! The weight is still coming off and she continues to waste away!! Im soo proud of her! She finally at that point where she can feel more confident. Have to buy new clothes because she is swimming in hers now! I love that im here to see it first hand and experience it with her! I, too, have been losing weight! New clothes have had to been purchased and i must say its nice to see a new size on my clothes! Lets just hope i can keep it up!!
Posted by April at 8:48 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Shut up and Drive!
Hello people! I write to you from my desk in my room with my music blaring! I am in an exceptionally good mood right now! Loud music always helps! ( screams) SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLE!!!!! So yea, that's the song I'm listening to at the moment! It gets me pumped! Cant help but move.... and smile..... and move!!! No shocker at all but its on the Twilight Soundtrack, which, to my surprise, was/is actually really good! Very diverse! I can get my screaming music, and my feel good music, and my slow down music, and my moving music in just 12 tracks! So I should move on to updates!!
Sophie was always tiny! And i knew she would never be a huge cat, like Winston was! She's a princess and she knows it! Its a privilege when you get to be in her company! But she's a momma's girl! Sophie likes to come into the bathroom with me when I take a shower. He sits on the counter and waits patiently or comes and sits on the bath rub ledge between the shower curtain and shower liner. Its sort of like her own personal sauna! But when I'm done with my shower i HAVE TO pick her up and throw her over my shoulder. Only then am i allowed to leave the bathroom. This is welcomed with a very loud purr of contentment. Sophie always cares nothing of modesty! She prefers to be on her back, her legs spread as wide as possible! She loves her belly to be rubbed. Lately, since Ive been reading alot, she has taken to coming up on my bed, mid sentence and stare at the book, like she want to know what I'm reading! I tried reading aloud to her, and she would go to the end of my bed, curl up, and close her eyes, or she would rub her face in the book and try to chew it. I think she just doesn't want to compete with the book! She also prefers to sleep leaning against something! Like I said, they each have their little quirks!
On a similar subject, I think I might need to go ahead and address the other anniversary that is coming up at the beginning of April. April 1st to be exact. I thought maybe i should go ahead and talk about it because when it comes that time I know I wont want to discuss it much..... not that it ever gets any easier. That's another thing that is difficult to think about. April 1st with be a year since Winston passed away. His presence is still felt in this house. We ordered a grave marker for him and it came in yesterday. The inscription reads, "Our Special Boy, Winston July 1998 to April 2008."
So with that being said it will be a month of celebrating birthdays and those who have passed. Life isn't always easy! But its smart to try and learn from it, right? Well I'm thinking I will close with that! It weird, I'm finishing this blog and the last song on the soundtrack plays, Bella's Lullaby. It makes me cry every time, just because its beautiful (of course it doesn't hurt that Rob wrote and performed the song for the soundtrack. Just another facet of his abilities). Anyway, to get by I will just go to a happy place I have acquired! In my car, windows rolled down, light breeze, a never-emptying gas tank and my music as loud as it can go, with an open stretch of highway! What i wouldn't give to be there now! I can feel it already! Here I go.........
Posted by April at 10:15 AM 1 comments
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Here's to a Brand New Year, New Beginnings, New Everything!
So it has been a very long time since I updated. But I swear I have a good excuse. First, and foremost, I hope everyone had a great, relaxing holiday. I'm sure, for most of you, you will be going back to work on Monday. So take advantage of your last weekend and enjoy it. I cant remember what all I put in my last entry so I'm just going to wing it and hope that I don't repeat myself.
Work had been the same; stressful & hair-pulling. I was not enjoying myself or what I was doing. But I sucked it up and dealt with it. Again, if it hadn't been for Shannon, my co-worker at FKO, I probably would have lost it a long time ago. Of course, on the nanny front nothing had changed. Hours all over the place, guilt trips; the usual. But I just kept telling myself, PAYCHECK PAYCHECK PAYCHECK!! BILLS, BILLS, BILLS! The FKO Christmas Program was on the 14th and it turned out pretty good. Of course, parents love seeing their kids on stage no matter what they are doing, so even though the kids could hardly stand still and barely sung a note they were still adorable. The following Tuesday was the Christmas party. And that day went like pretty much every other holiday party, CRAZY!! But it was better then most years and I didn't feel like I was running in circles. I was a little disappointed that Jerry did not show up. In my past blogs, I have written about Jerry, the boy who had a bladder problem. Well it turns out the boy had a very big anger problem too. He got in the habit of kicking me, hitting me, slapping me. So he took several trips to the office where he proceeded to completely trash the office. His father, not unexpectedly, had had enough and said if he acted out one more time to call him at the first incident. It happened again, his dad came and got him, and said he wasn't sure if he would be back. I felt bad for Jerry. I didn't want things like that that happened at FKO to bring him more trouble at home. But his dad said that he does that to women in general, which was another scary development. All I can do is pray for the boy and hope he and his family find peace, and answers. Anyway, I left Tuesday bidding my co-workers a great Christmas and would see them in 2 weeks.
That same week, on Friday, was grocery shopping day. It was a little weird this time because mom had a doctor's appt. in the morning so I couldnt call her if I had questions about anything on the list. So I'm walking through the store and I get a call from her. She can barely speak, shes giddy as hell! She got on scales and could actually be weighed! Its the first time in a while. She had lost over 50 lbs. I was in the middle of H-E-B going OMG MOM OMG! THAT'S SOOO FANTASTIC I'M SOO PROUD OF YOU!! lol I got some looks but I didn't care. I couldn't have been more happier for her. I finish my shopping, and go home. Its getting on 10 in the morning and I get another call from mom. Its kind of a blur what happened next but I remember mom saying something to the effect of, "Ummm, I wont be coming home, I broke my leg!" I said.... WHAT!!! Apparently she was stepping off the curb at the doctor's office and broke her femur, right close to the hip. Thankfully, strangely, she felt no pain, just instant numbness. So I called my other boss and told her I couldn't make it to work (or course it seemed like I was putting her out.... like I planned it). I'll cut a few corners and say that mom spent up to 4 hours in the hall of the ER because the didn't have rooms, and then, when she was finally admitted, they took her to surgery, where they put a rod and 2 screws in her leg. So the next few days consisted of being up at the hospital, keeping her company, and trying not to let her sink into a black hole. I'm not a huge fan of hospitals in the first place, but there are a few exceptions where I couldn't care less where I am, as long as I am there for support and encouragement. Examples: Family members in the hospital, friends in the hospital. In other words, I don't hang out at hospitals for fun!! Now let me go off on a tangent here. With the exception of a few workers (I.E. the weekend staff, the PT, and the OT (which happened to be one of my old friends, Sarah, who's over-all demeanor brightened moms day and in return made me every so grateful)) the staff there SUCKED! I understand that all occupations have their fair share of gossip, but when you talk about it while her DAUGHTER IS IN THE HALL, you better watch the hell out. I have never been so close to going up to someone and just punching them in the face. Here I am, crying because I'm thinking my mom isn't going to be home for Christmas, shes antsy and confined and trapped and frustrated and there's nothing I can do and you sit here and bitch and complain about your job! Ever heard of BED SIDE MANOR? I guess not! Mom got her survey for her stay at the hospital today and quickly took it away and said that she better not let me see that or I might take it upon myself to fill it out for her; which I soooo wish I could. ANWAY!!!! We had been hearing not to get our hopes up that mom would be home for Christmas, but she did!! Now, it was a question of how to get her home. At first she was going to take a van from Hendrick's to the house, but since she could walk (mind you very little, very slowly, and very poorly) from her bed to the bed side commode, her insurance wouldn't cover it. So Citylink it was. We thought she would get dropped off at the house, but apparently in order to have that privilege you had to apply 30 days in advance. So here is mom, by herself on this Citylink bus, having no clue where she is going. They ended up taking her back to the main station and she had to wait there for a bus to come that would make a stop close to the house. The people there were unfriendly as well. Long story short, mom ended up getting dropped off about 2-3 blocks from the house, and dad had to push her all the way home, across SOUTHWEST DRIVE! So this just added to my anger. Of course, anytime a family member is hurt or in a situation like that, you want everything done quickly and efficiently. Obviously it doesn't always work out like that. But I didn't care. So, we got her home and she's been here since Dec. 23rd! Thank god she made it home for Christmas. Diana got to come into town 2 days earlier then planned, and that was a god send too. I felt lost; where to go, when to go, don't cry in front of mom, keep your hopes up, stay strong, but I want to cry, Diana is being so strong I wish I could be like her, Dad is holding it together, crying wont help anything right now, I hope mom's going to be OK, Wow 50+ lbs. that's amazing I'm soo proud of her. My head was everywhere, and no where, for a while. It was soo nice being able to see Diana, though. It was such a nice visit and felt like it flew by! Diana and Josh got their families web cams so now we can keep in touch visually! Diana and I got to play with it a little while yesterday--- it was FUN FUN FUN!! Oh, let me say HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY, DIANA!! LOVE YOU!!
OK, so now onto a new, but conjoining subject. Since all of this happened with mom, we hit a snag in the Scott household. Mom was not allowed to put any weight on her leg except on her toes. So she needed 24- hour care. So what was going to happen when both Dad and I had to go back to work? We talked about it and talked about it and came to the only clear solution.... mom and her health are more important to me then working right now-- she needs me so I will be there for her. In all reality I felt lucky and blessed that I was even home and in a position to help out. The decision was made for me to quit both of my jobs and stay home to now be "on call" for mom! We were lucky and thankful that we had family who could provide help in several areas to make this happen. So then it was time to make the phone calls. My nanny job was first. I was terrified to make that call. What as she going to say, how would she act? In a nut shell, I told her what had happened and the decision I had made. I told her I know that it must be an inconvenience but my family comes first. I told her that I could get back to her by Sunday (I called on Friday) and let her know the final decision. And then, to add to my already high level of frustration and anger, she said, "Well if you could let me know, like, tomorrow that would be better because it is sort of an inconvenience." I have no reaction to write to that that would explain what I felt. All I can say is, obviously, I was making the right decision. I had to go over Saturday to pick up my Christmas gift and bonus, where my boss proceeded to tell me that she was thinking of just holding my job till I could come back. Her husband didn't understand why he had to be present for the conversation at all, which I thought was because he wouldn't have to fight me for his children's affection anymore so he wasn't all that upset, but nevertheless I was a little put off. My boss thought that I was quitting because I was worn out and had had enough. And while that is a reason, its not the reason at the current moment that I quit. I told her that it would have been May if not now. And she said May would have been better because she could get college kids to watch her kids easier then she could now. I really have nothing more to say on that subject, other then when Maddy found out I might be leaving she completely melted down..... so I didn't get to say goodbye to her, which completely broke my heart. But at the same time I thought maybe it was better that I didn't say goodbye. That way the last memory she has of me is a good memory and not a sad one.
Then I called Kathy, the FKO director. She was far more understanding, and said she would not accept my resignation, but would keep my job open in case I still needed some money until my new full-time job came through. I am very thankful for that. I think she is still holding out that I won't quit, but, unfortunately I already have pre-plans in the works of my next hopeful job. And while the perfect job in my head is one similar to THE OFFICE setting, i'll settle for something kind of quiet, with steady hours, decent pay, and benefits. So all prayers are welcome for my new beginning.
So that leads us to the current day. I feel we are still trying to work on a routine but we are getting there. Mom is able to get up more on her own and Im soo proud of how strong she is and how she is coping with her situation. Of course, she has her moments where she feels trapped and frustrated and all Dad and I can do is be there for a shoulder to cry and moral support. But mom is such a head strong women, I feel that her recovery will be a smooth one!
Let's see!!! Oh, the cats!! So of course their world was turned upside down when all of this happened to mom. They had to be locked up in my room more often then not and Alex was not having it. He started climbing my door and making god awful moaning sounds! Then, all of a sudden, I started to notice him positioning himself over Sophie, as if he was going to mount her. The thing is, his expression on his face looked as though he was completely confused as to why he was standing where he was. Sophie usually got up and walked away. But it was happening over and over again. All I could think was, "Wait, he cant feel those feeling anymore, he has no balls for the love of God!" Anyway, after some research and some awful thoughts of having to call a vet and ask if this was "normal" I found out that it was either because when he was fixed, both of the testicles had not dropped so there was still one there (OH GOD NO.. PLEASE NO) or he was craving attention. I went with the 2nd and proceeded to let them out more, especially at night, and smothered him with love and attention... to the great unhappiness of Sophie (I'm her pet, not his :) ) but he hasn't done it again since, thank god!
In few words, because I care not to talk about it much, apparently the Broncos like setting records that no one wants. Like being the first team to have lead their division the entire season, only to loose to a team that was last in their division at the beginning of the season. We were 3 games ahead........ SERIOUSLY!!?!?!? Then they fire Shanahan. I never thought Id see the day. Who knows what next year will be like. I'm thinking it was better we didn't make the play-offs. We obviously didn't deserve it. We needed to go into off-season and work things out, become better, hopefully.
OK so, hopefully I captured everything in this entry. Long, drawn out, long-winded, whatever you may think of it; all I can say is its detailed and relieving to talk about it and put it out there. Now the changes seem real and I am optimistic! So even though i was more then ready to see 2008 close, Here is to a brand new year, new beginnings, new life!
Posted by April at 8:58 PM 0 comments
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Hmmm... Where to start?!.... How about, "Hey, Happy Early Thanksgiving!"
Ok, so yes, its been over 2 months since I have posted. Some might think, "Wow, that's great! She been soo busy she hasn't had time to update!!" This is only a 1/4 of the truth. In all actuality, I have either been, too tired or to upset. So let me see if I can catch you up!
So that has been my November so far. I so want to mention that there was a very important elections that took place this month, as I'm sure EVERYBODY knows. I was more then pleased with the outcome. The following day I actually was in a great mood. I felt good about what had just happened and I felt... as weird as this might sound.... safer! I was proud of our country and where it was headed. Then... i went to work at FKO on Thursday, and the first thing I get hit with are racist jokes by one of the people I work with. Mind you I understand she is of the older generation and probably stuck in her ways, but I was mortified. Not only were they inappropriate, but we were in a CHURCH for goodness sake. There are 4 other ladies I work with, and the one that works beside me is the only one I know of that voted the way I did. She was upset as well when she started hearing the jokes. It made me ashamed. I know I didn't say it, but I was ashamed that things like that still happen. Mind you, I didn't expect the country to change over night. But, seriously..... I just have no words sometimes.
Posted by April at 10:12 PM 2 comments
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Hell Week
Well, as I thought, the past week did end up being my HELL WEEK! Several things-- almost everyday-- attributed to this week of frustration and, in so doing, made me really evaluate where I am in my life right now. Since it is a full weeks worth of drama, I ask ahead of time that you forgive me if I don't completely stay on track. I might leave some things out as well but Ill try to remember it all. SOOOOOOOO...... HERE IT GOES!
Monday:
This day was fairly quiet-- for the most part! I headed over to my nanny job at about 10:15-- I was told to feed Brooklyn and get her to lay down around 11 because Jeff said as soon as he gets home he was going back to bed. It seems that he and Stacey forgot about someone having to take Maddy to school on Monday! So I did as he asked and went home around noonish! I came back at 5 and fed the girls, gave them a bath, and played a little while. Mind you it started this early (Monday) that both of the girls decided they were going to really see how far they could push with me. I labeled the week with them ATTITUDE WEEK. I took them over to their grandma's around 8, then went home with one thought running through my head... 'That wasn't so bad. I can do this!"
Tuesday:
Of course, as a reminder, I do FKO on Tuesday and Thursdays. I should have known the day was going to be bad with the way it started off. I have a little boy named Jerry in my class. Now his grandma said they were working on potty training with him. And it was not going so great. He had an accident not 5 minutes after his dad dropped him off. So I had to halt a conversation with another parent that I was having and take Jerry to the bathroom so I could change him, and at the same time run back to my room and clean up the carpet before the other kids decided to walk through it and sit and put their hands in it. So I got Jerry cleaned up (Note*: FKO started 2 weeks ago and Jerry had an accident on the first day as well so... yea). So as I was cleaning Jerry up I told him that he needs to let me know when he needs to go potty so we don't have accidents any more. Not 10 minutes later....... he has another accident. I was speechless. I literally stood there for 2 minutes just looking at him. So I went and changed him... again.. and this time put him in a pull up. Just to add to the day, the rest of my kids decided they weren't going to listen to a word I said. They would look me in the eye and intentionally do the opposite of what I told them. I was completely blown away. I didn't understand what was going on and why they were deliberately disobeying. I went home that day seriously considering quitting FKO. That was by far the worst day I had had at FKO since I started working there.
Wednesday:
I went to my Nanny job at 10:45 as I usually do. Its pouring rain and as usual Jeff is asleep in his bed at the front of the house. Now this family just finished getting their formal living and dining room hard wood floors done. I always come in the back, as does everybody else. I show up at 10:45 and Brooklyn has not shown up yet. Her grandma was supposed to drop her off. So I waited. At about 10:55 I hear the doorbell. My first thought is CRAP WHO'S RINGING THE DOORBELL, JEFF IS SLEEPING. So I run to the door (as quietly as I can) and open it up and there stands Brooklyn and her grandma. I'm soo confused-- she knows Jeff is sleeping and on top of that, its pouring raining and now Brooklyn has to walk on the newly done floors to get to the den. I have the grandma telling me Oh April, your going to have to dry that up, quick. So I'm standing there thinking, "Well what do you want me to do, take this stuff out of your hands and make sure Brooklyn doesn't fall and break her neck, or go and wipe up the water on the floor?!?! So I took Brooklyn back to the den and got her situated, then got a towel and got on my hands and knees and wiped up the water. I went to go get Brooklyn some lunch and she didn't want anything that was available and gave me her usual twisted face and stomped out. I fed her lunch, whether she liked it or not, and then we went to go lay down. And of course she started crying, "I don't want to go to sleep in my crib." My first thought was, "Well I wouldn't either if I was almost 4 and still in a crib." But unfortunately if I lay her on the couch she wont go to sleep, and as cranky as she had been SHE NEEDED SLEEP! I left a little after 2 and tried to take a quick nap, which really wasn't happening. I went back that night and the girls had attitude again. I found out Maddy lied about the drink situation in her lunch so I told her I was going to have to tell her mom and she said I KNOW. The girls were eating dinner (Hot dog, goldfish and half an apple) and everything was fine, except Brooklyn was eating as slower then a snail's pace. Ive been trying to get her to learn to eat in like a 45 minute window because at FKO they have about that long to eat and play before its time to pick up and head to nap time, and she had been doing real well for a couple of weeks. So I started their bath, and Maddy was ready, but Brooklyn sat at the table, playing with her apples. She had already been eating for an hour at this point. Now on a side note, whenever I have to give the girls a bath I have a special thing I do with them. I wrap up each of them in their robes then throw them on the bed. After they lay there for a few minutes I shake them and that's how they drive off, and they love it. Its now become a must every time I am there for bath time. So back to the story. I kept on telling Brooklyn that she needed to eat her apples and not play with them. She would look at me then continue playing. So I told her that if I had to ask her to eat her apples again then I wouldn't throw her on the bed. And needless to say I had to ask again. So I told her no bed. She didn't believe me until the girls were getting out of the bath and Maddy got to be thrown, but not her. She pitched a bloody fit. So I had to explain to her that I wasn't doing it to be mean, but she needed to realize that I shouldn't have to ask her 10 times to do something and that there are consequences to repeatedly ignoring me. Of course she kept crying but she said she understood. I dropped the girls off at grandmas and went home. *sigh*
Thursday:
FKO again. I had had time to calm down and relax from Tuesday. Or at least as relaxed as I could be. I went in there thinking, "Today is a new day. New beginning. It will be great." Jerry showed up and I took him straight to the bathroom so we wouldn't have an accident. His grandmother told me that there were 3 changes of clothes in his bag and 1 pull up, because she didn't want him getting the idea that he could run around in pull ups all the time. Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't pull ups a potty training AID? If you know that he is prone to accidents wouldn't it make since to put him in a pull up and work from there. Now if I had only 3 kids at FKO, then I could devote more time to taking Jerry to the potty every 10 minutes. But i have 6-7 each day. I cant keep running to the bathroom to change him or make sure he actually goes, on top of making sure my other kids are tearing down the building. Long story short.... Jerry had 3 accidents this day. 2 of them within 5 minutes. The director of FKO, Kathy, ended up taking care of the last 2. She could tell that there was no way I could keep running back and forth with him. I'm really grateful she was able to help. That night Maddy had lost her privilege of my playing "Deer" with her (Deer is pretty much her running around and me trying to catch her). Her grandmother had told me, when I went to pick up Brooklyn for FKO, that Maddy was smart mouthing her all morning. So when I asked Maddy what had gone on that morning she tried to tell me it was all her grandmothers fault, which I knew was a lie. So she lost the Deer privilege and we watched a movie instead. Stacey, the mom, ended up coming back that night because her flight into Houston on Friday had been cancelled because of the hurricane so she found a flight into Midland that night. So with this being the case, I still took the girls over to their grandmother's only I took them a little later then usual. I was excited that I wouldn't have to go back Friday night!!
Friday:
I showed up at 10:45 as usual.... only no one was home except Jeff, who was asleep. I waited, and waited, and waited. Around 5-10 minutes after 11 Stacey walks in with Brooklyn. Shes hurried because she is supposed to open her store so she gets her stuff and goes. I do my usual with Brooklyn, "Brooklyn want to play something?" "No, I want to watch Dora." 'Well we can play something while we watch Dora." "SHSHHSHSHHSHHSHSHSHHHSH I cant hear." "Brooklyn, #1 you do not talk to me that way, #2 What have I told you about saying please and thank you?" Lunch was made and eaten, she was laid down for a nap, then I sat there waiting anxiously for Jeff to get up so I could go home. I was glad that part of the horror week was over.
Friday night I went over to my friend Kristen's, and she gave me a nice little pep talk about some thoughts I had about where my life was going. It was a good push and it made me realize how much I was going to miss her.
Saturday:
This day...... my fish.... committed suicide. You read right, he committed suicide. I had had Daniel for quite a bit, a year, if not almost a year. About 4-5 months after I got him he started to swell up. It looked like he had swallowed a rock or something. I kept thinking he was going to keel over any day. But he was such a trooper and perservered on. I thought he'd die of natural causes at least. So Saturday, I had just cleaned his bowl (I will say I am in major fault because I always seem to wait too long to change his bowl) and I realized I ran out of water conditioner and that I would have to go to Petsmart Monday. So I'm sitting at my computer around 2 something and I hear this noise like something fell, like a bottle cap or something. Now Sophie was in my room and I should have known because she was looking up, while I was looking down. I didn't see anything and went on my way. I fell asleep after 5 and woke up at 6 and decided to feed Daniel. So I look for him.. don't see him. I stand up on my little stool and look directly in the bowl.... nothing. My first thought is, "I did put him back right-- he didn't get washed down the sink? Yes I did. WHERE THE HELL IS HE?" My second thought was, "Oh crap if he jumped out I hope Sophie or Alex didn't eat him. They have been in and out of my room all day." So I start searching the floor........ and I found him. He was under my little rolling cart by my bed-- covered in fuzz and hair-- stiff as a rock. I couldn't believe my fish would rather jump from 3 feet in the air to its death then live with me. I felt like a fabulous pet owner that day. That night I ended up going bar hopping with Kristen and some other friends from work. It was........ different. All I can say is I never have and never will be a "bar" girl.
So that's how the week ended. I'm soooo glad its over. I have much more to look forward to now. All the good TV starts back up in the next few weeks. And hopefully the Denver game today is a sign that this week will be far better then the last. Mind you I only got the last 9 minutes of the game but OMG i cant remember a time where I was soo nervous the last 2 minutes that I just couldn't sit down. Out of any of the games that San Diego one was the one I really hoped we would win and wanted to win.... AND WE DID!! By a miracle, mind you, but a win none the less. Mom and I had another tiny tiny sob fest at the kitchen table, today, thinking about Christmas and how Winston wouldn't be with us this year and how hard its going to be not seeing him under the tree. But then thoughts went to remembering that we needed to find the kitties stockings for Christmas and get them their own ornaments since Winston had his and its only right that they have theirs.
I still have a lot on my mind. This blog is devoted to the past week. My other thoughts will have to wait for a later date. But for now, I'm going to go watch some Cold Case and relax on my bed with Sophie by my side. I sure missed not being able to spend our usual quality nap time together, and apparently so did she. Till next time, here's to a much better week, and a lot less urine.
Posted by April at 7:35 PM 2 comments